Pascal Gabriel

3. What you don’t live, doesn’t let you live

By 2. Oktober 2019No Comments

You were born happy. Your nature is happiness. Babies don’t need therapy.

But inevitably you will experience one trauma after another in the world. Simply because you have to have positive and negative experiences to know the difference. Requirements, expectations, commandments and prohibitions – everything that suppresses your development becomes an unconscious part that also wants to live.

The negative aspects of your personality are those you reject, although they have become a part of you through your experience. They are socially unwanted needs, suppressed traits, unloved parts of your unconscious personality. These traumas become your shadow, the dark aspect of your personality.

If you do not express your shadow, it expresses itself. Then your life will be dominated by negative parts again and again. You cheat on your partner, quit your job, live lonely in a cave, steal money from grandma. Whatever dominates your life is something that has power over you until you take it away. Until you express anger, shame, guilt, sorrow and all other demons. This makes every form of self-expression a responsibility to yourself. The degree of your freedom is measured by your courage to feel and digest unpleasant feelings.

The other side of your shadows is also your unconscious, strongest talent. If you understand the downside of your personal medal, you can use anger to motivate others, use loneliness to bring people together, use shame to make others more open.

If you live what you haven’t lived before, two things happen at once: you and others become happy, like babies who don’t need therapy.